Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Doctor Update

So I know you all have probably been anxiously awaiting news as to what happened at the doctor's office. Well, we did not get good news. Although the sac had caught up in size there was still nothing present inside the sac. By this point they needed to see at least a fetal pole and a yolk sac to say this could be a viable pregnancy. So we were given two option, to miscarry naturally or to do a D&C. After tears and contemplation we've decided to try and let mother nature take its course and see if I will miscarry naturally. Obviously, there is a very small small chance it won't and we'll have to go in for a D&C anyways. She said that at my last ultrasound the sac was perfectly round and at this point it was more oblong shape. She said that was generally the first sign that the body realized there wasn't a baby growing. She guessed that it would be a matter of about a week or two and said to be checked again in 3 weeks if I had not miscarried by then. They also gave me my rhoGAM shot yesterday on the rare chance that the baby generated any blood cells at all. (If you don't know what I'm talking about google rhoGAM. My Rh factor is negative)

So the big question, how are we doing? Well, as some of you may know, Dalyn's last day for residency was today, so we're busy in a flurry of moving. That's kept us super busy. We have the most amazing and supportive set of family and friends two people could ask for. And I feel like all in all we're both doing really well, considering. Of course, we're sad, disappoint, mad, etc. I don't think we'd be normal if we weren't. However, with that said we are leaning on God to seek understanding and direction. We know that He will be here to get us through this and that He knows what's in the bigger picture. So I think that has given us both and amazing amount of peace with everything. Of course as I said before we received and are still receiving an amazing amount of love and support and encouragement from our family and friends that has helped us to make it through the last two days. Please continue to pray for us and our strength to help us make it through this difficult time.

Monday, June 29, 2009

AM Doctor's Appt

So we go to this doctor this morning at 10:45. Up until this morning I had been a picture of complete calmness. I thought I had made peace with whatever was going to happen and then on my way to work this morning it hit me like a ton of bricks. I had a flurry of emotions come over me and all of the sudden I just got really nervous. I've been praying about it for days and leaving it up to the Lord to do as he sees fit so when it hit me this morning I was kind of surprised. I will update everyone as soon as I can but we no longer have Internet at home so it may be a few days. I'm trying to leave it in God's hands and am continuing to pray for peace no matter the outcome. Please pray for us.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

New Etsy Finds

So its been a while since I posted any of my finds from etsy so I'd thought today would be a great day to share those.

These Moss Letters are so neat!! And they come in any letters so you can make words, initials or whatever. I think for $35 a piece they would make a cute new addition to our seaside retreat! http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=24141892&ref=fp_feat_5

How adorable are these little hats!! I think they are a cute difference from the regular baby hats. And the little bill on them makes them that much more adorable. http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=26663665


Also I absolutely love the blocks and are going to be a must have in the nursery. So if anyone is looking for something to purchase for us down the road, this would hit the jackpot!! :-)
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=17648473


I think this print would be a welcome addition to the nursery or anywhere in the house for that matter!! And what a neat way to add the announcement to the house!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=26266405


For the past couple of times we've moved I haven't really send out address cards or moving announcements but I decided that I would this time because I think I must have these.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=25177179

Monday, June 22, 2009

6 Weeks - Things With Me

So in the spirit of celebrating however much longer I have with this baby I'd thought I'd update everyone on how things are going with me. So far you wouldn't really know I was pregnant. My number one complaint still at this point is exhaustion. And we'll if that's all I have to complain about I don't think I'm that bad off at all. I'm not extremely hungary in the morning but after lunch it hits me like a ton of bricks about every 2 hours, I feel like I must eat or I'll waste away. That normally continues through bed time and sometimes even a little past. I've had a couple of times when I thought I might be nauseaous but its left just as quickly. My doctors office told me to look for a decrease in symptoms. How do you look for a decrease when you really haven't experienced much to this poing anyways?? I'm fully prepared that this baby might not come to be but I've given up zero hope on this baby. I'm holding out that when I see this little one on the ultrasound next week, I'll get to see everything that should be there including a heartbeat! I just feel like it really has to be. However, I know that God is in control and that he will do what's best for us and this baby. I've decided instead of worrying myself to death this week that I'm going to pray everytime a worry-some thought enters my mind. This way I will give all control to God in the situation.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Happy Father's Day To Be

So I've decided that to get through this week I'm going to continue to enjoy it as though I know nothing could be wrong. I'm going to enjoy every last minute I have of this pregnancy, no matter what!! And that includes wishing my husband and very special Happy Father's Day "to be"!!!! I know he is going to make the most amazing dad. And while I know he's trying hard at the moment to stay strong for me and I know its certainly not easy for him either. He's an amazing person and I'm very blessed that God saw fit to bring him to my life and I know that this child and any other children to come will be even more blessed to call him "dad."
Happy Father's Day To Be Sweetheart!!!
I LOVE YOU AROUND THE UNIVERSE!!!

Friday, June 19, 2009

Not So Good News

We had our first ob doctor's appt today. I had been extremely excited to go and see how things were going!! Needless to say I didn't leave the appointment with the same excitement I went into it with. Basically, what's happening is I should be 5 wks 6 days today. However on the ultrasound I'm only measuring 4 wks 2 days. So the nurse practitioner comes in and drops a bomb (with very little compassion might I add) that the news wasn't so good for us today. She proceeded to tell us that because I'm currently 10 days behind and they could see anything other than the sac she thinks there's we're dealing with a blighted ovum. After lots of tears and this just can't be true and we're so confused she decided to step out and call our fertility doctor. So after leaving us hanging another 15 minutes or so she bounces back in to say "positive outlook." I'm sorry but I mean WTF honestly does she know what we've been through to this point?? Does she have no compassion for our situation?? At this point I'm furious and an tired of hearing what she has to say. She tells us that our fertility doctor said this is not an "uncommon situation" and that they've had this happen before and that's why they usually request not to do an u/s so early. Our fertility doctor asked them to repeat the u/s in about 10 days to see what was going on then. She said its very possible that in 10 days this baby could catch back up and be perfect. She also wanted to do another HcG test to see if its still going up. **Side note - - it was 3876, so its definitely still going on up** So now more than ever we need prayers for this little bean to grow grow grow and hopefully be caught back up. It's going to be a long long 10 days. Please pray for my sanity as we have lots of other stuff going on as well. Please just pray for us.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Great Things to Report

2736!!! She said is right on target for what they were expecting. She said everything is going great right now so they are going to go ahead and refer me out to see my OB. They want me to see her for all my pre-natal testing and first ultrasound before we leave Knoxville. God is great!! and he does answer prayers in his time.
Thank heaven for tiny miracles!!!!

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Maybe, Possibly

Infertility was by far one of the longest, most painful journeys I've taken in my adult life thus far. And is some ways I still question is it really over?!? I question should I completely let myself go and believe that it's finally our time and that God has blessed us with a miracle. I think a lot of my fear is that I've taken so long to get here I can't imagine losing what I've waited so long for. I go back to the doctor tomorrow and I'm really nervous about my blood work. I just pray that everything will be ok, even though in the pit of my stomach I feel it will be. I mean don't get me wrong I'm ecstatic about being pregnant but I'm very terrified to allow myself to completely fall into it for fear of being heartbroken. Every little twinge or cramp I question. Luckily, I haven't had any spotting (fingers crossed that I don't) otherwise I think I would be completely on the edge. After tomorrow I think I'll be able to rest a little more at ease. For now I just wanted to share a little of my early pregnancy anxiety. I'll update you on the b/w tomorrow!!

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Week 5 - Things With Me

So far so good on the pregnancy front. I haven't been feeling pregnant really other than the extreme bout with exhaustion and hunger. We've broken the news to everyone now and everyone is more than over-joyed for us. This week went by so fast I feel like I didn't even live it. I made my first trip to Barnes and Noble for some baby book shopping. I didn't buy anything on my first trip (I felt a little overwhelmed when I arrived at the pregnancy section) but in the remaining days of this week managed to collect a good number of books I need to get through. Casey got me the cutest Pregnancy Journal and I can't wait to get busy writing in it. She also loaned me a book called Baby Bargains and . Ashley loaned me the book I'm Pregnant and a Baby Name book. And then I purchased What to Expect When Expecting and A Child is Born and for Dalyn I got Pregnancy A Dad's Week by Week Guide (so Dalyn would feel left out). So needless to say I've got my reading cut out for me. I've only gotten started on a couple but I already highly highly recommend the A Child is Born book. Its AMAZING!!

In other pregnancy news, I go back on Wednesday for my 3rd blood test. My doctor would like them to be over 1400 so pray for good news. Then if everything is ok I'll go back in another week for my first u/s. I think it won't really all set in for me until the u/s. Then I'll likely go in for one more ultrasound before we leave for NC. Keep praying that everything continues to go as they are and that my numbers on Wednesday will by well over 1400!!! Also, thanks to everyone for all the wonderful well wishes. We couldn't be more excited and are so happy to have so many people in our lives to share this with!!!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Oh Baby, Baby

I use to think I could keep secrets like no other, well apparently its only when its not my own. I've been dying for three days to tell everyone and we've finally agreed to spill the beans,
WE'RE PREGNANT

Yes you saw it correctly, We're Pregnant!! After two years of trying, 4 doctors, lots of medicine and even more tears we got the amazing news on Monday that we are expecting. I can't begin to tell you the huge mix of emotions we've been feeling over the past few days. We are elated and we were so happy to get such a great response from all our wonderful family!!! Everyone is as excited as we are, if not more. In the next couple of post I want to document how we told different people but for now I just wanted to make the announcement and update to this point.

Just a little bit of information. I'm a little over 4 weeks, actually I'll be 5 weeks Friday. Yes, really early I know and we weren't going to tell everyone but all our bloodwork is turning out great and we really just want to enjoy every little moment we can. I want to be sure to document everything because I want to be able to look back and read it. So here it goes. . .

I was supposed to start on Sunday, all day Sunday no cramping, no spotting, Nothing!! But I had told myself I was going to hold off until Monday when I went to the doctor to test. Well, Dalyn convinced me otherwise and on the way home from Jonathan and Casey's we ran by Walgreen's and bought one HPT. I tested almost as soon as I got home and almost immediately a little plus sign appeared. (Keep in mind, first positive I've EVER seen) All I could say to Dalyn was "Um" and motion him towards the bathroom. Sure enough he agreed it looked positive. So we sat around in shock for the next hour or so and then I made him take me back out to get the one that reads, "pregnant or not pregnant". Fool Proof, right?? Apparently so because after about 2 minutes from arriving back home what did I see, PREGNANT!!
So of course I took 3 more (so 5 if your counting), all positive. I slept a whole 3 hours Sunday night waiting to get up and to the doctor Monday morning. Monday morning came and I went to the doctor at 7:45 expecting my results a little before 12ish. Well, needless to say it didn't happen but around 2ish the phone rang and it was the call I've been waiting to hear. "Jessica, This is Dr. Harris. Your right, Your Pregnant!! Congratulations." She said that my HcG(pregnancy hormone) was 88 which is really good and that my progesterone was 80 which is even better!! She said she'd see me back on Wednesday (today) to do repeat bloodwork. She said the goal was to have the HcG double. Well, way to cooperate body because it was 269 today!!! She said everything looked perfect so far. I'll go back for another HcG test next Wednesday(17th) and then my first ultrasound the next Wednesday(24th). The question of the day so far, How am I feeling? So far so good. Really no major complaints, I've had some mild cramping which is normal but nothing other than that. Of course, I'll be keeping everyone as up to date as I can so stay tuned.

Also, I just wanted to take a moment and sincerely thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers over these last months. They have not gone unnoticed and we certainly appreciate every last one of them. With that said please continue to pray that my pregnancy continues to progress as it should and that I have a very healthy pregnancy and baby!!

Stayed tuned for the adventure to come!!!
p.s. I'm having trouble getting pictures to upload so as soon as I get that to work I'll upload some fun pics we've taken.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Oh The Joys

So I need a little moment to vent. I feel like I've been handling the stresses of moving pretty well to this point, however our landlord is currently showing our house in order to rent it back out. So she has asked that the house be cleaned this week in order to show it this weekend. So needless to say with boxes and yard sell stuff everywhere it kind of pushed me over the edge. So I've been spotlessly cleaning the house in order to appease her and well I've decided I need a house keeper. I mean normally house work doesn't really bother me but we've been on our hands and knees scrubbing floors, etc for the past few days. And I'm done with it!!! I could care less to see another bottle of cleaning solution. I mean honestly how does dust even accumulate so quickly!! It seems like I dust something and come back and its covered 10 minutes later. GRRR!! Not to mention that Sampson must shed like 20 million hairs a day!! I'm done, I have to clean like this again the day we move out and well I've decided that Merry Maids may have a job on their hands!!
Thanks for listening to my venting!! I'm sure this won't be the last over the next few weeks.

Monday, June 1, 2009

On The Road Again

Well I guess this kind of makes it official!
I booked our moving trailer this morning! They are set to drop it off June 24th and pick it up on June 29th. We should be leaving Knoxville on June 30th :-(! I'm certainly sad to be leaving but am also looking forward to this next chapter.